Councilman Rich Green’s duck didn’t win the derby but that doesn’t mean he wasn’t a hero. During the Ducky Derby held on March 19, Councilman Green’s duck dipped his head under the water for just a moment and discovered an orange and white striped fish thought to be the famous missing Nemo.

Councilman Green’s duck carefully scooped the fish into his beak and brought him to Nancy Hewett who was standing by with the net to help complete the rescue. Blake Syndergaard got on the bullhorn to call the police who happen to be practicing for their mud volleyball tournament against the Mesquite Fire and Rescue at the Splash Pad adjacent to Hafen Park.

The emergency squad arrived in record time and Mesquite Fire and Rescue took custody of the fish. Nemo was placed in a holding tank pending his safe return to ocean waters. Mesquite Police began the investigation into his kidnapping immediately and in the course of the investigation discovered that the fish was, in fact, not Nemo.

Further investigation revealed that the fish once belonged to Council Woman Cindy Delaney’s granddaughters who are residents of Beaver Dam.

Delaney was in custody of the fish over Spring Break and discovered the fish dead in the bowl. Thinking that she could “just replace the fish” Delaney went to the local Walmart and bought a fish that looked similar but was much smaller in size than the original.

Delaney’s granddaughters, Beaver Dam high school students, took just 10 days to notice the difference and reported the “missing fish” to the police. Police Chief Tanner was going to coordinate with Fire Chief Kash Christopher during the Rotary’s mudd volleyball tournament but Mesquite Fire cancelled their participation in the tournament. The cause of volleyball cancellation was “training” but nothing has been verified on that subject to date. Police were eventually able to contact Mesquite Fire and Rescue and recover the fish.

Upon careful examination of the fish Dr. Peggy Purner discovered the fish had a severe personality disorder which caused him to bang his head on the sides of the bowl until he knocked himself out. Council Woman Delaney was unaware of this strange occurrence and the granddaughters were sympathetic to the misunderstood situation as were the police so no charges have been filed.

Delaney’s granddaughters decided they didn’t want a reoccurrence of this horrible misunderstanding so they turned over custody of the fish to We Care for Animals who promptly adopted him out to the Mesquite Local News where he is safe and in his forever home with two other goldfish and the office kitties.

Editor’s note: April Fool!!!

Disclosure: The story is purely fictional when it comes to Council Woman Delaney and her granddaughters, Nancy Hewett, Blake Syndergaard, Dr. Purner and Councilman Green’s duck. We’re still not sure about the Mesquite Fire and Rescue and Mesquite Police. The animals, however, are the office fish and cats and do exist, stop by and visit. Thank you all for being great sports!