By Trina Machacek

Over the years I have brought things into my home. Many, many things. The food comes and—well to be blunt—food comes and goes! But! Yes, a varied thing covered “but.” It’s all the other things that I have come up against recently.

Trina Machacek

After some thirty years I am having new carpeting installed in my home. Every room, even new fake wood looking stuff in the kitchen. To get ready for this event I have been requested by the carpet guys to pick up things off the floor. “Not a problem,” I said to the guy in his showroom. “Not a big deal.” I also remarked. He just smiled and said “Fine.”

Oh be careful what comes out of your pie hole Trina!

Alan, the salesman at the Carpet Connection in Fallon, Nevada was very soft spoken and as I talked and as he listened, I think he realized I was not your average house mouse lady.  From the beginning I figured he knew I was there to buy and have fun doing it. First thing I said to him as I walked in his store with the piles of flooring and rolls of carpeting was, “So, do you guys do carpet?” l could just hear Bill Engvall saying, “Here’s your sign!” Alan and became fast friends. Here’s what happened when after the first meeting…

It’s 181 miles from my home to the carpet store so I had many miles to think and plan my attack to get ready for the carpet and crew. As I say in many of my adventures, “Hey what could happen!?” I thought about moving the few things that would be in the way. The microwave is on a rolling cart. Easy. I would put the easy things in my “office/spare bedroom” on the ground level hearth that will the few things in there. The other spare bed/work-craft room only has a bed, a handmade bench and two bookcases. Empty the bookcases. Not a problem. Last would be my bedroom. I couldn’t see much in my head. Well, there might be a few extra things in the closet. But again, this will all be a snap. So I drove easily home with a plan. An easy, done in a day easy plan. HA!

It was dark by the time I got home so I everything did not get a good looking over, until the next day. That was almost a month ago. Today the layers are coming and I just finished moving, stuffing, sticking, clearing, cussing and fussing getting ready for new flooring. This is what I have learned, and I feel impelled to pass on to you and will pass it on for the rest of my life.

STOP BUYING STUFF! That of course will never happen. I mean come on we are stuff buying people. It’s shiny, or has a cute saying, picture, design on “it, we are all over it. Or giving it as a gift.

I honestly didn’t know where to start. Front of the house? Back of the house? Alan sent a couple of nice guys out to measure for the flooring and as they went throughout my home measuring they told me what all I would need to do before they came back. Sweet Mother Of Pearl! When I was told to pick up all the things off the floors I forgot about the closets, the pantry, the storage hidey hole under beds, behind doors, and on and on and on.

I started with the linen closet because it was right across from the bathtub and I thought the few–yes there’s that word again FEW! Few things covering the bottom of the linen closet would take like twenty minutes to move. Well, three and a half hours later I could see the carpet at the bottom of that teeny closet.

When Alan called in the next couple of days to move up the timeline for the install I laughed out loud. The date was left at three weeks away for me to shoot for. Let me tell you, there were times that shooting myself would have been merciful.

What I came away with as I sit here writing, while three really nice guys tear into my floors to make me a happy little rural girl, are these three things,

1.    Every gift I give from now until doomsday will be either food or a disposable item.

2.    When I go to put all this stuff I’ve picked up, put on counters, widow seals, closet shelves, in cabinets and drawers that were handy and yes, the bathtub and the shower! I am going to have a HUGE garbage bag handy.

3.    I will think, really think about it every time I set something down for just a second. Because that second easily becomes for the rest of your life!

Trina lives in Diamond Valley, she loves to hear from readers. Email her at itybytrina@yahoo.com